It's not like I am babysitting the President's children!!

Imagine my surprise when I found this in my email:

"Hi Student-With-a-Possible-Record-But-Awesome-Personality,

Thanks for letting me know about your availability. We will consider you for a clerkship position for the summer. Right now, we are running background checks [emphasis added]. That process should take about a week to 10 days. Once it has been completed, you should hear back from us about the summer program.

Sincerely,

Unsuspecting-Lawyer-Who-Never-Bothered-to-Ask-if-You-Had-a-Record"


Shit.

Post-Script: I got a job offer from this firm. Must have unscrupulous background checkers. I should fit in well here.